Spiritually Unequal Marriage

Going Alone? Oh No Siree!

I sat down a few minutes ago to prepare this post. Before I started typing, I stopped to pray. I prayed for all of you who read the posts, Church or no-Church. I thanked the Lord, our Great King for each of you who took time to leave me your thoughts, your prayers, your concerns and your experiences.

Church or No-Church, Part I

Church of No-Church, Part II

I have read and re-read your comments just now. I have tears in my eyes. I have been writing here for three years and the advice and love and comfort all of you have given through your comments is some of the best I have EVER read. I encourage all of you to read the comments from last week. Such words of wisdom. You may very well leave your computer today….. CHANGED. PERMANANTLY – CHANGED!

I know that I am.

On Friday I wrote that I was seeking answers from the Lord and how He is always faithful to answer when I pursue His wisdom. Girls and men, He did not fail me. I have a powerful story and prayer to share.

Before I tell you what happened, I think it is important to point out some interesting observations from all of your comments.

First, not all of us agree. After reading through the comments and the private emails I received, it looks like the church or no-church decision is very personal and individualized.

Second, it appears most of us actually have grappled with this very choice and have spent considerable hours, years in prayer and in thought, determining what is appropriate for ourselves, our kids and especially our husbands. These decisions were not made lightly.

Third, many of you found your spouse attending after you released pressure on them. hmmmmm

Fourth, many spouses attend to make their wives happy and that works as well. hmmmmm

Fifth, the enemy is often at work in this situation. (Boy, is that the truth)

Okay, now I want to share a direct message that came to Lynn Donovan on the beach Thursday afternoon. The minute I heard these words, I knew Jesus was correcting my perspective and re-directing my path. The words spoken to me were what I needed to hear and penetrating. I am changed.

So, here goes…

I am fortunate enough to have a small group of friends from my church. We meet together once a week to review the pastor’s message and to pray for one another. Until this year, I was never comfortable as a “married-single” to be part of an intimate group like this. I always felt like a third wheel among all the couples. But, my friend, Pam, loved me so much and welcomed me after inviting me year after year to join the small community, that I felt ready. Thank you Pam!

Well, because most of the families in our group are on a budget, we look for inexpensive ways to enjoy the summer with our kids. The beach is perfect. Free rides on the waves, beach combing and you pack a lunch.

On Thursday, I arrived at the beach and joined a few of the other gals there. I sat down with Gina and Jolene and I shared with them my struggle with this church or no-church thing. They know me and my husband and listened with loving hearts and ears.

I explained my dilemma, “Jolene, it is just so hard to sit there (in church) when he is angry. I don’t want him there.”

Jolene, looked at me and she said. “So what.”

Hunh? No mercy here. Jolene isn’t one to beat around the bush.

She went on in a kind and loving voice. Her message was not to hurt but honestly to help. “Lynn, you know that my husband and I were unequally yoked for many years. He came to Christ a little over five years ago. But before he was saved I would literally be on my knees before the Lord, begging Him to place Himself anywhere and everywhere in front of my husband.”

Hunh?

“I would pray, “”Oh Father, place yourself in front of my man at every turn. Put a Christian man next to him on the airplane today. Father, let my husband catch a glimpse of you through a song, or something on television tonight. Lord, surround him with other business people who love You at his meeting today.””

“Lynn, I wanted my husband surrounded by the Lord. If you want the same, you will want him at church too. Let go of yourself here and if your man is willing to go to church then rejoice as you sit next to him, because the Lord is answering prayer.”

Gulp!

“Oh, Jolene, you are absolutely right.” I knew in my heart, for me, the right thing was to get over myself. And at that instant I did. How dare I let this be about me?

On Thursday as I sat under a cloudy sky at the beach, the Lord spoke. He didn’t speak audibly but through a wise and Jesus-loving friend, Jolene. I now pray much differently and with a new heart for my husband. I stopped asking the Lord to save my husband and to have him read the Bible and to open his spiritual eyes. These prayers are not wrong but I now I am moved to pray like this:

Oh Father, today let me just love him. Pour Your love into me is such a powerful and complete way that I am just bursting with You all over everyone and especially my husband. Father, I beg you to place Yourself before my man today. Be in front of him as he searches the employment boards for work today. Lord, place one or two men in his path at the store today or on the phone who know You. At the barbeque tonight, I ask that there would be one or two Christians who initiate a conversation with him. Lord, I ask you to surround him with You. Fill his morning, noon and night with some message that puts You smack in the front of his face. I ask Your will in his life and not my own.

Lord, YOU- sit on my throne.

 

You sit on my throne.

You sit on my throne.

I love you Jesus. I love you. Your humble servant, Lynn

Spiritual Leadership and the Heebie Jeebies

Jesus said: Luke 6:41 “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? 42 How can you think of saying, ‘Friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.”

Why, do we constantly feel the need to change our spouse?

Okay, perhaps it’s only me, but I don’t think I am alone. Often in my conversations with believers I discover that we, women, want our husbands to be the… -spiritual leader of the household.

Shudder…

Those few words can give me the heebie jeebies. Spiritual expectations create a ton of unhappiness in our married relationship. Okay, I know I have probably offended you. Stay with me here. Let me state that it is correct thinking and Biblical to desire our man to be the spiritual leader of our family. I get it, really.

Where I see this go terribly wrong is what we as women “think” that leadership should look like. Do the words family devotions and leading prayer nightly and Bible discussions with the kids and, and, and… ring a bell? Yikes!

I know there are a few men out there that bring these qualities and activities to the home. They are actually rare from all my years in talking with Christian women. If you have a man like this, kneel down right now and give thanks to God.

For the rest of us. Relax.

Why do you wait for your husband to lead devotions? Where did this expectation come from?

I would submit to you that men practice their faith differently than women.

Allow your husband to be who he is.

I know this, if my husband became an on fire believer tomorrow, he would never be comfortable enough to lead family devotions, and it would probably take him years just to pray out loud. I am okay with it. It doesn’t mean he would not be the spiritual leader of our home.

What Jesus calls us to see is our man’s fruit. Not just the man-(woman)-made suggestions of practicing faith. Take a step back. What is the fruit? What is in his heart for what is in the heart come out of the mouth. Look at his character. God cares so much for our character and a little less about leading family devotions.

Jesus said: Luke 6: 43 “A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. 44 A tree is identified by its fruit. Figs are never gathered from thornbushes, and grapes are not picked from bramble bushes. 45 A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.”

Perhaps this was a tough post. Perhaps you don’t agree. That’s is okay. I hope however, it causes you to think about the good fruit in your man today. Give him a break for the things he may not do and give him a hug for the fruit that is evident. Have a blessed Friday, Lynn

WITHOUT A WORD by Noreen

As a young engaged woman I worked at a Christian preschool and was surrounded by godly women whose lives modeled the role God intends us to walk as wives and mothers. I didn’t realize how much they influenced me until I began to write my wedding vows and although I wasn’t saved at the time my vows were scriptural. At the time I purposely and willingly left out the phrase to submit and obey for I knew I surely would be tested on this.

You see I was a child of the 60’s and 70’s, a vocal spokesman of Women’s Liberation. In the early years of marriage I was saved and began memorizing scripture; one of the very first verses I memorized was 1Peter3:1 “In the same way you wives, be submissive to your own husband so that even if any of them are disobedient to the Word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives”.

In the margin next to this verse is the year 1988 that I first claimed this for my beloved. After memorizing this scripture along with many other verses pertaining to marriage, I stopped leaving index cards with verses on them around the house, I stopped preaching at him or leaving “subtle-not so subtle” hints around the house of what I wanted him to become. I made a conscious decision to let him see Christ in me instead of hearing what I wanted him to hear. I wanted and still want him to be won without a word.

I would be tested on this almost immediately and I can say it was the most difficult test I ever faced. At the time my beloved husband was dealing with a wife who had changed overnight and he wasn’t very pleased with the changes or what I was teaching our daughters.

One morning he announced to me that I was no longer able to take our girls to church. Stunned and hurt I quickly told him I would submit to this but he had to know I would never stop teaching them about Jesus and the bible. This was the hardest thing I had ever faced; I spent days in concentrated prayer over whether or not I should obey, I sought the advice of godly council and I grieved. How could this be happening? Everything within me shouted out in rebellion, to seek my own will in this situation because after all I had rights didn’t I?

During these days of seeking the Lord’s heart in this matter, in my marriage and in begging for His grace I knew something immediately- if I was to pursue doing what I wanted and disobey my husband, his heart would forever be hardened to the very One I so desperately wanted him to know. So after much prayer and many tears I willingly stepped away from attending church in order to honor my spouse. I also gave up being a discussion leader in a large women’s bible study, another part of laying down my life that took everything I had.

I would love to tell you that he immediately saw my submission and went to the cross but it didn’t happen like that. During those early years I did see softening and subtle changes in his heart; several times he even suggested that we go to special Christmas services at our local church.

It was many years later through a set of circumstances that he finally agreed to let me take the girls to church. It was such a privilege for all of us and we cherished it even more because of years going without it.

Here I am 30 years later, still learning to obey and submit to my unbelieving spouse and still waiting for that day when he will come to the cross. I do not believe this is the choice each unequally yoked spouse will face but I do know that we will be called to lay down our lives for Christ.

During those long years, the reality of being carried by Christ was almost tangible to me. His grace covered my two daughters and me. I know my beloved was sanctified and blessed by his believing wife.

My two daughters are godly women, married to godly men and are raising their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

I am so grateful the Lord has allowed me to walk this walk for so many years. What a glorious day it will be when one of the lost return to their Father. I look forward to that time but am content to wait upon the Lord. Someone once said “Prove Jesus to the world that His Word is true” and I love to reflect on this. Love your spouse as unto the Lord, today and every day for the rest of your life.

_____

Noreen writes at her blog, Life Blessings. Thank you Noreen and Carrie for sharing your heart and for honoring Jesus here at Spiritually Unequal Marriage and through your marriages. Be Blessed, Lynn

Day Three: Believing Like Abraham

Welcome to day three of our week of fasting and prayer. I know many of you have joined us in praying and even fasting for your spouses. I'd like to encourage you to continue, in whatever form God is leading you, to keep your vigil going.

For the sake of simplicity for my family as we continue through the final stages of my daughter's treatment (and she's doing great, praise God!), I chose to fast through my first meal of the day and devote my morning quiet time to seeking God's will for this next year. The emphasis of course is for my sweet hubby, who seems even more set in his atheism than ever. My faith choices have even come under more scrutiny of late.

So, I'd like to share some of what God is showing me through this time of fasting to encourage you to keep going, and most importantly, to keep believing. I've signed my posts with the words "praying and believing" since I joined Lynn here (still such an honor!) and I will be honest, there have been times typing those words didn't come easy.

Sometimes disbelief has a way of sneaking in. Then we find ourselves doubting, wondering if we ever really had things straight, heard God correctly, or missed the mark somehow. It's so easy to find ourselves in these dry places when we keep praying and don't see any changes.

For two days I've been hearing God say, "Believe like Abraham." And I believe this is a message for all of us. I sense deeply that God is calling us to take our faith to the next level and truly believe Him for the things we're asking in his will—for the salvation of our loved ones, and many other things.

You know, we can have great faith and trust in certain areas, yet doubt in others. I'm realizing I have great faith when it comes to trusting God for my loved ones—for my husband's salvation, for my youngest daughter's complete healing from cancer. Yet my faith wavers a bit in the small areas. The little things.

But God is calling us to believe like Abraham in all things. To take that step of faith and say, "Yes God, I believe you are in the middle of this, and I am praising and thanking you now for what you're about to do." To pray for a unbelieving spouse as if he or she were already saved...

Spend your fasting and prayer time today first, confessing any unbelief that has found it's way into your heart. Like the father asking for his son's healing said to Christ, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)

Then ask God to grow your faith. Ask Him to show you a Scripture for this week that you can memorize and use as a reminder that Christ is the author and perfecter of our faith, and will therefore increase it. We need simply to ask.

Praying is the beginning of the journey, belief is the completion. Let's make 2009 the year we believe like never before.

Praying and believing (and typed with trust),
Dineen

Trouble ~ Transition ~ Tension

Today is our conclusion to the Love Our Neighbor series. Walking through this scripture has left me permanently changed. My heart for people softened. This series brought with it the Kingdom Assignment. God gave us a chance to practice kindness, and goodness. He gave us a chance to be the hands and feet of Jesus. He watched, as we loved our neighbor.

This series unfolded Matthew 22:36-39 and Matthew 25: 14-30.

I understand this command in a way I never did before:

Matthew 22: 36 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" 37Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'

Our world reverberates with hate, bitterness, and broken dreams. When we give our love away a doorway opens. Kindness and compassion overcomes barriers, hatred, and anger.

It opens a door to share Jesus.

Today, right now in our country and in our world, doors are opening.

People come to know God usually through three circumstances; trouble, transition, and tension. The pressures of the terrible T's propel people to search for God. Our world is smack in the middle of all three. People are scared, they are in financial trouble, and tension mounts each day as we watch the nightly news.

Our opportunity is NOW.

From this day forward I will never be the same. I am going to live every day of my life, giving love away, opening the door for God. I will be obedient. I will be kind. I will live compassion. I will live for Jesus.

If we truly live in this kind of obedience, our unbelieving spouses, our children, our neighbors, the world will know there is a God and He lives and works in our lives.

Lord, this is my prayer for every reader who stopped here in the last few months. Let your Holy Spirit fill us so full, that kindness is in our every breath, love in our eyes, and compassion in our hearts. Let us live it. Let us be the door to share with this broken world the life-changing truth: OUR GOD SAVES! I ask this in the powerful, awesome, glorious name of Jesus, our Redeemer, and our Lord. Amen.

Please share with me what happened with your Kingdom Assignment. Whatever you did with your dollar is exactly what the Lord wanted. Don't judge it unworthy of mention. Allow the Lord Jesus to receive honor because you used God's money in some way to serve His kingdom. Write to me today a quick note. Please email me. You can read other's stories by going to the Kingdom Page through the link in the sidebar.

I am excited to see where the Lord will take us next. You should know I am always just as surprised by the Lord as you are when we walk through these journeys. Thank you for walking beside me. Your friendship, wisdom, and love are gifts I can never repay. But, I sure do tell my "Father" about all of you often. Have a blessed week, Lynn

Weekend Devotion—Are You Envious?

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness. — James 3:13-18

These verses were part of my devotional reading this past week. When I read it, I immediately thought of how often the unequally yoked tread this ground. We don't mean to, but when we see couples and families worshiping God together at church, we can fall into this trap of envy. Then our envy can turn into ambition as we try to manipulate our unbelieving spouses into going to church with us next time.

James tells us in these verses that seeking wisdom from God will help us reap the best benefits. We can take those feelings and turn them into more constructive actions that will speak louder than anything else to our loved ones. By submitting our envy and and selfishness to God, we can grow into the peace-loving, considerate,  fruit bearers of Christ that God intended us to be.

Through God's strength we can become the peacemakers in our family and be visible representations of the righteousness of Christ.

Praying and believing,
Dineen

Ready to Graduate

I want to graduate from the unequally yoked club. I bet you do to.

In January of this year, God had me write something important down. He gave me a specific word about my future. Part of what he said was, “this is the year I will do great things in your life.”

Now I will honestly say I knew these “great things” didn’t necessarily mean complete success and all my dreams coming true. I know God well enough to understand that what I consider great and what I want may not necessarily be in agreement with what God is shooting for.

And I’m a firm believer in Romans 8:28. I have no doubts that everything God does has a purpose, nothing is wasted, and anytime we, his children, are included in these events, he always has our best interest at heart. So even faced with a difficult road ahead of us, I know God has a plan, a reason, and I trust him.

But looking back at his words during this time with my daughter has illuminated a new aspect for me. What God considers great can have much deeper ramifications. And more difficulties than we anticipate.

Sometimes “great” has farther-reaching ramifications than we can ever imagine. “Great” then takes on deeper meaning than the casual usage implying better than good. Great can mean significant, important, earth-moving and life changing.

What do we do in those times?

Hang on to God. I can tell you from experience, he’s very faithful. He’s certainly not letting go of you. And if you’re a control freak like me, the best thing you can do is spend a lot of time with him, especially in his Word. The better you know God, the more you will understand his will and find peace in acceptance and trust. God speaks, we just have to listen.

Look beyond ourselves. There’s always a bigger picture there, I promise you. I can look back over the last seven years and see ways God has been moving us to this point, AND preparing us for what we face right now. Those times are significant. Those times were great. Struggles, difficult decisions, set backs, failures—all of these have equipped me to deal with we are facing now. In this viewpoint, I can be grateful to God for all he’s done to get me ready. And I see it’s really not about me. It’s about God and his plan, which he set in place from the beginning, and he’s completely in control of it all and knows the outcome. I can’t do any better than that, so leaving it all in his most capable hands brings me tremendous comfort.

Join God. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned recently regarding ongoing issues is that much more is accomplished when I seek to join God in the process instead of demanding God just fix it and make it go away. Does it seem like God’s not hearing your prayer in a particular situation? Are you praying over and over again for God to change/fix/remove this problem, but nothing’s happening? Change you prayer. Instead of asking God to deal with it for you, ask him how you can be a part of the solution. God doesn’t need our help but he wants us involved as part of our growth. And that growth is what brings us closer to him, allows us to know him better, and even gives us a glimpse of what God has planned in his perfect will.

So much has happened in my family these last few weeks. And we still have more to face. We learned yesterday the tumor is cancerous. She will need more surgery, weeks of radiation, and months of chemotherapy. I know there will be days that I will wonder why God has taken us down this path.

But for now, I’m holding onto God’s promises for my daughter and for my husband. I can see that there is so much more going on than just the visible. God’s allowed this time for a greater reason than ourselves. Lives will be touched and changed. One in particular… God’s presence is being and will be revealed.

I want to be a part of that. I want to walk alongside God and participate as he’s calling me to. The big picture is salvation and relationship to God. That’s what this is all about.

And I can’t wait to see the culmination. I’m ready to graduate.
Praying and believing,
Dineen

The Most Dangerous Prayer

Hi friends! I'm still traveling! Here's a post I wrote in November of 2007 that is still so relevant. :-)

It’s birthed in the deepest recesses of our hearts, then moves with our silent yearnings to the hidden places in our thoughts. We dare to think it, until we finally submit and give words to this most dangerous prayer.

“Lord, do whatever it takes to bring my husband/wife to Christ.”

Among the unequally yoked there is an unspoken enormity to this prayer. And we understand the journey it takes deep within ourselves to finally speak it—to pray it with sincerity, knowing full well we have no idea what we may have unleashed. It comes from a place of near desperation and complete trust in God.

We are willing to risk it all.

At times the urgency of this prayer fills me with such desperation that I can hardly breath. And when I am overcome by it, God tells me this is just the minutest fraction of what he feels for my husband.

Can you imagine?

Can you imagine a love that wild and all consuming? Then I realized that God feels that way about us and pursued us then just as He is pursuing our loved ones now. (Talk about really leaving a girl breathless!)

That kind of love never fails. It’s always there, protecting and watching. He’s got our backs. (Isaiah 58:8). We just have to trust him and let go of our expectations, preconceived ideas, and fears. He will equip us to handle whatever comes. (I’m listening to those words as much as you are.)

Amazingly, I’m the one who’s been changed the most by this prayer. At first what I thought to be terribly unfair now appears to be part of a grand plan. A time of preparation. With each pruning, I find myself more and more grateful, and humbled. (There’s hope for me yet.)

Perhaps it makes a difference knowing the outcome—God gave me a glimpse of what’s to come several years ago. Or perhaps it has more to do with how He has strengthened my trust and reliance on him. He’s shown me my fallen-ness. I have no choice.

What are you willing to risk for your unbelieving spouse to know Jesus? What are you willing to pray for that loved one? Are you willing to walk into the unknown realm of God’s will, and trust him completely with the outcome, no matter how you’re affected in the process? It’s a scary question, I know!

When I worry what this prayer will cost me, I remind myself that God will equip me for whatever comes. That’s been the whole point of this time of preparation. And then I remember that He made the greatest sacrifice. He already paid the highest cost of all with his Son. And nothing I could lose can compare to that.

Praying and believing,
Dineen

Would you Change Churches?

I have spending a significant amount of time thinking about church. I am one of the thousands of spouses who pray in hope that my husband will want to attend church.

In our early years, of course, this prayer was completely self-centered. I wanted my man to become a Christian because my life would be simpler. Also, I didn’t want to go to church by myself. Can anyone relate?

I can recall my husband standing in our church sanctuary last year. The band was playing – loudly— and my husband was embroiled in the “hostile” stance. Hands on hips, elbows jutting out, and a look of exasperation on his face as he stared forward. No singing, no participation. He was mad.

I probably coerced the guy into attendance that morning. I looked over at him and could feel the anger emanating from him. Tears sprang into my eyes. I was so upset because he was mad. The morning was a total loss.

Half way through the service my husband could tell I was hurt. We muddled through the motions and left. On the ride home, in a teary voice but honest voice, I released him from attending church and I honestly meant it.

That was the day I completely stopped influencing him into church.

However, I STILL deeply desire my husband to attend church. My reasons are different today than in my selfish years. However, he remains at home on Sundays while I head off for services.

I began asking myself the usual questions. Why doesn’t he like church? If I attended another church, would he go? What makes church attractive to men?

I read the following in Today’s Christian Woman magazine last week:

Wish your spouse spent Sunday mornings with you? Choose a church with these men-friendly characteristics.

Large congregation

No denominational affiliation

Strict scriptural adherence

Young multiracial crowd

Authoritative, male pastor

Informal dress

Modern technology

Fun services

-adapted from How Women Help Men Find God by David Murrow (Thomas Nelson)

Hmmmmm. This prompts the question, would I be willing to change churches for my spouse’s spiritual growth?

Your thoughts? Hugs~ Lynn

Lessons from the Campground

Happy Friday!

I am away this weekend, traveling with my daughter and her Middle School Band. We are competing in San Francisco. I am one of about 10 chaperones who will be on a buss for a total of 16 hours with about 60 middle school boys and girls. I am scared!!! Can any one say a prayer??? *grin*

I want to share a post with you today that I originally shared at Christian Women Online about a year ago. Our family goes camping a few times a year. Each time I am delighted that God travels with us and never fails to provide me with a life message. To follow is one experience I will never forget. I hope you enjoy,

Better Than Reality TV

Friday afternoon we arrived at the campground. We bailed out of the car and began to unload the gear; sleeping bags, cook stove, food bins, and the most dreaded piece of camping equipment known to marriage, the tent.

This year we brought with us a brand new tent, still in the box. I spied the beast lying on the ground, knowing what must ensue. Looking around I was relived to see the campground was empty with the exception of a retired couple sitting quietly in their lawn chairs in front of their trailer about 100 feet away.

I approached the box, cut the tape and out slid the biggest pile of nylon and connect-the-sticks I have ever seen. The contraption sleeps ten. Why a family of three needs a tent this size, I still cannot explain.

Dragging the tent around on the site, I called to my husband for help. Thus the event commenced; the raising of the tent. This is a hotly contested battle of wit and patience between a husband and a wife. If television wanted a truly unrefined reality show, Raise the Tent, would win hands down. Two minutes into the set up, orders were shouted, my husband was obviously blind to the logic of my instructions. This became readily apparent from the look on his face.

A retort from my frustrated spouse was foreseeable. The sound level increased. I glanced over at older couple who sat smiling at their reading materials, afraid to look up for fear they would break into hysterics.

Precisely at this moment in all tent-raising events, children mysteriously disappear. My daughter retreated to the creek, suddenly captivated with the rocks at the bottom.

I lowered my voice but the yelling continued in what I call, snake whisper. It is still yelling just at a hissing level. I am sure some of you can relate. The older couple is no longer watching covertly, they sit mesmerized by our show activity.

Finally the Holy Spirit became fed up and tapped upon my heart. He reminded me I no longer needed to be in control. In the midst of our squabbling I saw my husband, a gift from God. I saw a man who has made me a better woman. The bickering diminished and the tent went up quickly.

My husband and I are spiritually mismatched in our marriage and although my husband has yet to discover the truth of Christ for himself, Christ is alive and active in our marriage. Christ’s supernatural power brings us through the arguing, disagreements, and tent construction. I look back upon my marriage journey and see Christ standing with us. He has been working through my nonbelieving husband to smooth my rough edges of selfishness and desire to control.

My spouse and I are the ultimate odd couple. Our back grounds and beliefs are vastly different, which makes our marriage, our happy and fulfilling marriage, a miracle.

An hour later, I sat at the picnic table waiting for our friends who were joining us to settle into their campsite. Their daughter wandered over for a chat. I asked her, “Did your mom and dad getting everything set up?”

She replied, “Yes, but yelling was involved.”

I laughed out loud knowing God was alive and well in the next campsite!

1 Peter 3:1-4 (The Message) The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.

May the God of the Universe be with you this weekend and at every campsight you visit this summer. Be blessed, Lynn